Oh, Ron
by GinAndMilk
Summary: Cedric takes the advice of good 'ol Felix to attain his greatest desire: Ron Weasley. HP Y4. While Ron and Harry aren't speaking. M because I'm paranoid: tongue rape & implied sex.


**Disclaimer:**I do not own Ronald Bilius Weasley, The Harry Potter Series, or the terms displayed in this Story. I also hasten to say Cedric doesn't belong to me, even though he's _really_ out of character.

**A/N: **Not entirely pleased with it. I'm not sure I ended it the best. And I swear, that moral-of-the-story thing just popped out of nowhere. Cedric's POV. #2:

"**Do you think [Ron] is hot? How hot?**

I wouldn't call it _hot_ exactly. More like adorable and quite fit. B) And fun to mess with."

* * *

><p>Cedric rolled the small vial between the fingers in his right hand while reading a note on a small piece of parchment:<p>

_Happy 17__th__, Ced!_

_ Everyone knows you could have any girl you want so, we started thinking: Why hasn't he gotten laid yet? And we've come to the conclusion that you're just a little shy when it comes to your lovers. So here's a solution we hope will help you get lucky!_

_ Your friends,_

_ Reginald Falspot & Gerald Mettles_

The golden liquid shimmered in the light of the dying fire. After five minutes more of contemplation, Cedric reached his decision: Tomorrow. Tomorrow will be the day I finally get Ron Weasley all to myself. As the clock struck 11, he hurried up the stairs to his four-poster and tried to will himself to sleep. Completely ineffective. He laid awake, eyes wide open, thinking about the possibilities Felix might bring. How far it would take him. Whether his friends' hopes would transpire. He blushed guiltily at the thoughts that that last brought about. With great reluctance, he shifted his thoughts to something a shade more dull: The History of Magic lesson he'd had earlier—Professor Binns' droning voice and the dull content of that particular lesson. He fell asleep almost immediately.

Saturday morning, Cedric awoke giddy. He didn't care that he barely got 5 hours of sleep. He didn't care that people were quite wary of his manic grin. It was all rather insignificant compared to the thought of being with the object of his greatest lust: Ron Bilius Weasley. His devil-may-care, mussed up hair. His great blue eyes, an ocean he would willingly drown in. His lovely light skin and perfectly placed freckles—it took all the concentration he could muster to not think of all the hidden places where he might find more…

He finished dressing and gulped down the Felix Felicis—being careful not to do so when anyone was looking. The affect was immediate. His already manic grin spread even wider, giving him the look of some who was just obliviated. Felix told him that he should really stop that, it would scare Ron, and anyone else for that matter, enough to want to keep a distance of at least 15 meters. Cedric toned down his smile to his usual, bemused one. He then had the sudden urge to visit the library, probably to return _Dangerous Potions With Good Intentions_. He'd taken it out to try a love —lust really— potion but he didn't have access to all the ingredients, unfortunately, and had abandoned this tactic.

He grabbed the large leather-bound book and trotted happily to the library. Upon arrival, he was somehow unsurprised to find Ron sitting in a corner, alone, doing what looked like a DADA essay. Cedric handed his book to Madam Pince and muttered something like _"Good Day"_ before he walked toward Ron's island of books. Ron didn't look up and Cedric stood there smiling expectantly for a good two minutes before making his presence known.

"Having troubles?"

Ron jumped at being unexpectedly addressed, looked up at Cedric and said, "Er. I can manage just fine on my own, thanks."

"Well, you know, I _am_ in my seventh year. I could probably be a great deal of help."

"And why is it, exactly, that you want to help _me?_"

"Well, why _shouldn't_ I?" his bemused smile growing wider.

"Let's think. First off, you're a Seventh-Year Hufflepuff. Second, you're my best mate's competitor. We've never even spoken to each other until now. Why the bloody Hell would I accept your help?"

"Because you seem pretty clueless as to what you're doing."

Ron blushed. It was just so completely _true._

"I know just about everything about the dark arts, too. I received top marks in all my Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.s," Cedric added when Ron did reply.

After a few moments of thought—It was very visible on Ron's face that some internal struggle was going on: His brows were furrowed, his eyes squinted, the corner of his mouth pushed tightly to his face—, he gave in, "Alright. But if I fail, the blame's all on you."

"And I'll owe you a dozen Chocolate Frogs," he said in a mock business-tone.

Ron gave a bemused smile and Cedric simply beamed back. The two then got to work on the essay. Cedric had never really minded homework but with the reward Felix was helping him with, it was a _Hell_ of a lot more enjoyable. He wanted to draw out this time he had alone with Ron but Felix knew better. They worked nonstop up until Ron's stomach made a sound like a volcano. His face distorted in embarrassment, Cedric simply smiled and said, "Well, we got the bulk of it done. Shall we take a lunch break?"

"Uh—yeah. Yeah, that sounds good."

They stood up and set to putting away the books that had accumulated on the desk—not speaking as they did so. Cedric enjoyed it nonetheless. When they'd put away the last book, Cedric made to walk with Ron down to the Great Hall but thought better of it—or at least, Felix did—and stopped.

"Meet back in the library in a half hour?"

Ron stopped as well and turned to look at Cedric. "You're not getting lunch?"

"I am—I just have something to do first."

It seemed like Ron didn't believe it but he didn't argue the point. "Alright. Half an hour."

He then turned back in the direction he was heading and Cedric turned down a corridor on his right. The first thing he noticed was that Headmaster was exiting a classroom and about to head in the same direction as Cedric. Upon noticing the boy, however he stood still and waited for him to come closer. When Cedric reached the spot directly across from Dumbledore, he stopped as well. The professor smiled kindly at the boy then started walking again. Felix knew that he should follow and Cedric complied. After a moment, Dumbledore walked into a small classroom and stood in front of the desk toward the back of the room. When the door swung behind Cedric, the old wizard prompted conversation.

"From my great understanding of youths, I sense that you are troubled."

"Actually, Professor, I feel _fantastic._"

"As do all who are under the influence of Felix Felicis."

Cedric didn't question how he knew he'd taken some. Felix felt that he ought not to worry about that particular fact just now. He just smiled sheepishly in response.

"Out of curiosity, what is it that you hope to accomplish with the help of Liquid Luck?"

Cedric blushed feverishly but he answered honestly, "Well, er, you see. I've fallen for someone who would be out of my grasp without a little boost."

"You realize, I hope, that after the effects wear off, there is a chance they'll feel differently? That you might say the wrong thing thus spoiling any hope of maintaining a stable relationship?"

"I did. But I decided it was now or never. I might not get the chance after the Tri-Wizard Tournament is over."

"Is this a lack of faith in our security measures? Or your abilities?"

"Honestly, Professor? A little bit of both. I mean, I'm of age and everything but there's always the slightest chance that I don't know enough to get through the challenges."

Dumbledore just nodded in response and muttered, "Yes, yes. Quite understandable." He then raised his voice to address Cedric once again.

"Well, I hope you can bear the consequences of your actions. And, though it's quite redundant to say, good luck! I hope what you wish to transpire will happen."

And without waiting for a response, he left the room. Cedric glanced at his watch and noticed he'd been talking with the professor for about 7 minutes. The perfect amount of time to make what was originally a lie, truth. What luck! He took the quickest route he knew to the Great Hall and sat with a group of friends. One of which had contributed to the purchase of the potion he'd consumed that morning. He also seemed to pick up on the fact that he chose today to be lucky—the grin on his face was just unbearable.

"So who's the lucky lady?" Gerry asked mischievously.

"I have absolutely no idea what you mean."

"Oh _suuuurrree_. It's written all over your face! You picked today to drink it!"

"Honestly, Gerry. You're completely off. I'm just having a surprisingly good day."

"And why's that?"

"I prefer not to say."

"Ahh. So the dirty deed has been sealed?"

Cedric blushed feverishly but gave no other response to the question. He just wanted to eat quickly and get back to the library.

"Ha! I knew it! Now at least if you die in this tournament, it won't be as a virgin!"

"Keep it down, will you?" Five more minutes until it was time to get back.

"Fine. At least tell me who it was."

"You'll find out soon enough, I hope. Now, I've really got to get going."

"What? You just got here! Oh don't tell me. Round two?"

"You sick _bastard_. Worry about your own sex life, will you?" he said it jokingly even though it was the opposite of how he meant it.

Gerry flushed, "Alright, fine! I'll shut up. I hope this girl is a complete _dog._"

Cedric dismissed that last remark and said in an exhausted tone, "See you, Gerry."

He responded with a rude hand gesture, still upset from being called out on: The man had never so much as _kissed_ a girl before. Or boy, for that matter.

He walked to the library at a leisurely stroll as not to seem too eager. Still, he was the first to arrive. He took a seat at the table he and Ron had sat at earlier. Something was off, though. He didn't even need Liquid Luck to tell him that much. He left the library and let Felix guide him to his destination. Apparently, his destination was outside a girl's lavatory. He couldn't see Ron anywhere so he decided to just wait—well, Felix was the one who actually made the decision. The bathroom seemed to have been flooded so he opted for the wall opposite to lean against. After about ten minutes had gone by, there was no sign of Ron, still. Hardly anyone seemed to use this particular hallway, actually. Only one person passed him the entire time he was there. A few minutes more and Ron finally appeared. He was covered in what appeared to be stinksap. Ron walked toward him.

"Er. Sorry for ditching," he said awkwardly.

"Well, it's pretty obvious why you couldn't come back to the library. What happened, exactly?"

"Peeves."

"Ahh. Well, you're welcome to the Prefect's bath. It's really close by."

"What? Really? You'd let me?"

"Why not? Come on, this way," Cedric turned to his left and start walking purposefully, Ron tailing behind. They turned multiple times and up a couple of staircases until they arrived at a statue of a rather odd-looking fellow by the name of Boris the Bewildered. Cedric whispered "_Pine fresh._" And the statue leapt aside and the boys entered the gloriousness that was the Prefect's Bathroom. It was lined with impeccably clean toilet stalls and toward the back sat a pool-like bathtub. In the middle of it were several gilded knobs and faucets. To the right were freshly laundered robes and towels and a shoot for dirty clothes.

"Er, I'll leave you to it, then," Cedric nodded curtly and made to leave but—

"Wait! How do I use it?"

"Well, you just turn the knobs until it's full. The bottom row is the water, the next row up is the bubbles and the top row's the foam. They all come in different colors, as well."

"I guess being a prefect's got its perks," he could hardly keep the amazement out of his voice.

"Your brother never mentioned it?"

"Well, yeah. He didn't really say much about it 'cept that it's a lot nicer than what the rest of us have got."

Cedric made to leave a second time but—

"Oi. You're not leaving are you?"

"I just thought you'd like some privacy. I guess I could stay, though," he looked at Ron with a befuddled expression on his face.

"What if someone walks in! They'll think I attacked a prefect or something to get inside!"

Cedric looked at him with a bemused smile then sat down with his back to Ron. He thought he heard the red-head breathe a sigh of relief before he started undressing. His grin spread wider. He then heard the sound of water pouring out of faucets. Then it suddenly stopped and heard the soft _plunk_ of a body dropping into the water. Only now did Cedric turn around.

Ron had left his stinksap-filled clothing on the floor. Using his wand, Cedric levitated the clothes into the shoot then scourgified the area they'd been.

"Oh. Sorry for just leaving that. And, er, thanks," he said it a little awkwardly and it was hard tell whether the flush of color in his face was because of this or the water.

"No problem."

Cedric knew no one would walk in, Felix had pretty much guaranteed that. But he was still a bit hesitant to _make a move._

Well fuck, here goes everything.

He undressed and plopped in on Ron's right—not too close, not too far, just comfortable.

"I felt a little awkward just sitting over there watching you bath."

"The feeling's mutual, mate. I was kinda hoping you'd do something."

They sat there in awkward silence for a moment. Then, Ron opened his mouth to say something but Cedric quickly cover it with his own. He grabbed the hair at the back of Ron's head with his right hand while holding his chin in his left. He was only a little surprised that Ron didn't refuse him—Felix had reassured him that he'd willingly accept it. He pressed hard on Ron's lips, disallowing him to break the kiss even if he wanted to, and flicked his tongue into the red-head's mouth. At this, Ron flinched at the unexpected change in technique but allowed it to continue and gave it a shot, himself. They explored each other's mouths at a pace that suggested that they wouldn't stop until they knew the exact feel and could recall it at a moment's notice. After a moment or two, they broke it. Ron was the first to speak.

"Er. You really know what you're doing, huh?"

"Not really—I'm just a bit lucky."

"Well, er—."

"Honestly Ron, just shut up."

Ron's face flushed and he turned away. Cedric, meanwhile, got out of the tub and proceeded to lay out towels on the bathroom floor. When he was completely satisfied with their placement, he walked over to pale-skinned boy sitting in the bath tub and held out a hand. It took Ron a moment to notice that it was there but when he did, he just looked up into Cedric's face.

"Come on, time to get out," he said with that bemused smiled on his face. Ron just nodded slightly and accepted the hand. Cedric kept a firm grip on the Gryffindor's arms as he pulled him out. Once he completed this task he nodded toward the towels he'd just set out. His pray didn't quite understand what he meant at first but as comprehension dawned on him, he looked at Cedric again.

"You can't mean to do it _here?_ What if someone walks in!"

"They won't."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Just trust me."

And at that, Ron finally fucking shut up. Cedric knew he had him. That there'd be no more protests, questions, doubts, whatever.

Next morning, Cedric awoke feeling rather pleased with himself, with Felix. He finally lost his virginity and it was the most perfect experience—no disruptions, no resistance, just _bliss._ He'd have to apologize to Gerry and thank him for the greatest present ever. No sooner had the thought occurred to him than Gerry had entered the dormitory. He looked rather grim.

"Something wrong?"

"I just wanted to inform you that it was false."

"I don't quite—."

"The Felix Felicis! It was a fake! Nothing more than water magicked to take the appearance of it. Anything you might have achieved yesterday, you did all on your own."

"But, yesterday was _perfect_. Perfect because I drank lucky potion not—."

"It was perfect because you expected it to be. Honest. Reg and I just thought it would be good fun to give you a fake and see if you actually fell for it. And, well, you have proven your gullibility."

"But, Dumbledore!"

"He was in on it from the start."

"And the library! The girl's bathroom! How did I know where Ron would be?"

"Well, _that_ must have been the hand of fate or something because Ron was _not_ in on the joke."

Cedric was stunned. If his friend was telling the truth, then that meant he did it all on his _own_. And far from being angry, he was quite pleased with himself. He hadn't needed a stupid lucky potion to charm Ron—just a bit of confidence.

"So, who's this Ron? It can't be Potter's mate, can it?"


End file.
